The House is Empty!!

They took my stuff!!!! My pillows, my couch, my bed, my other bed, my chairs, my rugs, my desks, my sun spot!!! They took it all!!!



I'm a little stressed out and confused by it all. I spent yesterday being very cranky and barky as the movers took all of my stuff, wrapped it up and put it into their big truck. I was one very unhappy pup. Plus they made me wear my handle all day long and alternately put me in my kennel and on my lead so I wouldn't be underfoot (I tried to stop them as much as I could, but they wouldn't let me!


So now the house is empty. And when I bark, it echoes... it is really sad. My space pod travel kennel is still here and some suitcases with mom and dad's stuff. But we are sleeping on the floor- which is awesome! Now when dad is sleeping, I can just walk up and lick his face, and when he turns away and tries to stop me, I can just walk around and lick him from the other side! muwhahahaha!

My Mother is Mean to Me

The question is Ange ou Demon? I am a licky demon, a sad angel...

Sunrise Walking

All this week mom and dad have been getting up at 5:30 or 6 in the morning in order to make themselves more into morning people after reading some article. I am not amused. As a luxury dog, I just want to stay in bed and hang out through the more mundane parts of the morning. However, I quickly realized that getting up early wasn't a bad thing at all! In fact, the article said that the best way to turn yourself into a morning person was to go for a walk first thing because the sunlight helps improve your body rhythm and gets you up early. Well, darn it if I am not a morning dog now! When I hear the alarm go off, I know to run straight downstairs to my box to get my lead!

This morning was especially nice as you can probably see in the pictures we took while we were out there. A beautiful Sunday morning after a pretty miserable rainy day. And since it was so early in the morning, mom let me off the leash with no restrictions to stay close! I got to run everywhere and see boats and birds and all sorts of fun rolling places.

As I perfected my eau d'Winston, in the newly cut grass of the meadow (apparently they cut the grass so the cows will eat the new shoots of grass, also it tames the meadow which is a very good thing!) I realized that I would soon be leaving my idyllic meadow to head to the snow bound tundras of North Dakota... mom and dad both wondered out loud how I would adapt to the changing weather.

But rolling through the meadow isn't the only way to perfect your eau d'Winston. As you can see the meadow was full of puddles even though the flood pond had receded a ways. I saw a bird and rain straight for it, and to my surprise, I ended up in chest deep water! However, when I managed to extricate myself, I realized how cool it was to run through the water at the edge! I always thought it was deep, but really I can just go through the water anytime! Mom says I better watch out or I am going to be spending a lot of time in the basement with Twag if I keep it up. I prefer to stay in the luxury of pillows and a bed so I think that I am going to stay out of the slough for a while.

On the way home we saw a squirrel!! We were turning the corner, when I just saw it in the middle of the road, and it froze, so I froze- but then it took off! Excited, I took off, yanking Mom around the corner (she almost dropped me, the camera, and whatever else she was holding), but when she realized there was a squirrel, she ran with me to chase it down! Unfortunately, it got up that tree in the picture before I could meet it, but I watched it from the ground in case it came down! As you can see, I also had no problems going into someone's yard to check out the squirrel problems.

Speaking of infestations- look what I saw!!! Crazy right? That cat was just brazenly hanging out on the street! I couldn't go get him because I am a good dog and I know I can't go into the road (or my parents shout pavement and I am in trouble). But i gave that cat a good staring down. It is ridiculous the problems we are having on our street....

So when I got back, I had to get a bath of course. But to my horror, I discovered I was using puppy and cat shampoo!!?!??! Now, normally I get the help to purchase the groceries, but I had no idea what an affront it would be! And to make matters worse, the cat is licking the puppy!!?!? What is that about? I am issuing a formal protest right now.

Non Sequiter Day at Winston's World

I am not a big fan of my mother right now...

Read my last post for better reading:

http://winstonbengfort.blogspot.com/2008/06/superman-is-not-cat.html

Superman is not a Cat!

Cats are not heroes, they are more like felons- they are worthless. I met a cat for the first time a few weeks ago, and let me just tell you- I was disgusted. They are lazy, sloppy, dirty, and conniving, more like a feline felon than a noble animal of the wild such as yours truly. It was on a walk that I met my foe, he was sitting on a porch stoop licking the dirt off himself when I decided to say hello and make a new friend. That thing just hissed at me, then jumped over the wall and, gracefully landed on all four feet to walk away snobilly.

Miffed, I thought that was the last of the cats, but I have been seeing them everywhere, and each time I do, the experience is a bad one. So I have decided to become an Action Hero in order to rid the world of these prissy purloiners. Every time we go on a walk I check in every doorway, to make sure that security is maintained. I didn't used to be so nosy, but desperate times call for desperate measures (Mom thinks I am nosy now because I was allowed to go inside Wolfson college, but I am really just securing the area from the kittyfestation).

Part of my Action Hero training includes reading the guidebook (seen above), luckily I am an Oxford graduate, something no cat can claim. Also, I have decided that since cats always land on their feet gracefully, that I will land in a more canine way, on my face. Whether it is tripping over dad's feet, going down the stairs too quick or jumping off the couch, I am determined to use my face as a gravity deterrent until the kittentastrophe is over.

To prove my point, yesterday I practiced my Superman. Superman, as I found out, can fly! I don't think he is a bird, but I don't really care about them anyway so long as they stay out of my yard and my bushes. So if he can fly, I can fly. Yesterday, when a person came over to look at the house stuff, dad was picking me up to carry me outside rather than get the attention I deserve from anyone I deign to allow into my domain. When he got to the top of the stairs I decided it would be a perfect time to practice flying.

So I wriggled out of his arms and kicked off the wall to jump over his shoulder. It was a long way down all of those stairs, but don't worry- I managed to land on my face! No graceful landing for this pup! Everyone was pretty horrified, but I got up pretty quick to bite the intruder- and everyone got mad, the fall must have knocked my nip into overdrive somehow, or maybe it was the Superman-like flying abilities that gave my jaw more strength, I'm not sure. Its not like I broke the skin or anything!

But one thing's for sure, no darned cat can ever fly or be Superman like I can!

Yawn, literally

Mom discovered that she could make me yawn on command yesterday, and it was kind of fun to yawn when she yawned. Yet, of course, as soon as I am on video trying to do it, it only works once, boring. Anyway, here is the yawn of a video, with everyone yawning but me...

The Stink Factory

Recently my parents have been complaining saying that I am a stink factory. I guess it is because I have found a wonderful new place to drink from: the sewer. Our backyard sewer has been clogged for some time, you may remember how upset I was when our back gate turned into a swamp. But because it is where all the dish water comes out, you can get some pretty interesting tasting water right in your own backyard! But now my parents say I am covered in stink all the time, and I have noticed I am being shunned/bathed a little too often, so I think I might cut it out. Anyway, they put a top over the main part so all I can get is what drips onto the ground...

Indiana Dog and the Lawn of Doom

The past few weeks have been nothing but rain, and as such the back lawn has become a little out of control, and more like a jungle. I couldn't go to the bathroom in the front yard, but had to resort to begging at the front door to go out in the front yard! As you can see, I had to leap through the tall jungle grass like a tiger or a lion in order to get anywhere! Thus the lawn of doom became my great despair...

We lost many good explorers in that jungle who set out to find the toys that lay in the grass for the move home. This Saturday, however, was the first sunny nice day that dad was home, something had to be done! The lawn of doom would be no more... Dad had to attack bits and then dump his basket, and it took a long time!

I didn't know if we would make it, I had to leap through it to escape a fate worse than being put into a kennel! We uncovered so many snails and slugs and beetles, they all kept running! I admit, I am a little scared of the mower, but I think that I managed to stay away. I even got in some licks of my own by tearing up plants and chewing up the grass- also pulling sticks and shrubs out of mom's hands and destroying them!

Finally, the lawn was tamed, and I can now use my bathroom in peace again...

The Almost Bird Catch

When Dad and Mom got home yesterday I went outside to greet them. It has been raining all week, but the past couple days have been extremely nice. Yesterday was the first day of the nice weather, so I was perfectly willing to go outside to see them. The front yard is my yard anyway. When it rains a lot, Dad doesn't mow the backyard. and it grows a lot, probably because of the rain. It becomes a jungle that is taller than my head. I don't like going to the bathroom in the rain anyway, so I definitely won't do it when there is a jungle. Dad and Mom solve that problem by letting me go out in the front yard on the pebbles, so it is my yard.

Well, I smelled something unusual in my front yard, so I totally ignored Dad and mom and went into the bushes, Dad and Mom were standing outside talking to someone, when all of a sudden, I found the intruder in my yard! I jumped up to grab it and leaped through the bushes, and almost caught the pigeon by the tail feathers as it tried to fly away. Dad also had a chance to grab it, but he didn't take it, even though the pigeon hit him in the shoulder!
I was bothered for a little while, but Mom has moved the furniture again, so I have a perfect spot to look out the front yard and guard it from any fowl play...

Eau de Winston

Springtime is here, and I have finally perfected my dog scent. And, actually, mom is not disgusted by it. And in a complete change of doggy policy, because of it, I am let off the lead far more often! It is win win for everyone!

So basically this is how it goes, to get a truly good scent you need to roll in stuff. Mom was never too pleased to let me roll in stuff because she thought I was rolling in the nasty. I used to, dead birds, goose poop, lady dog pee. But it wasn't quite right. But this weekend, after some amazing summer weather (21 degrees!!!) I finally got it right- wild parsley, clovers, bluebells, and dandelions! I started rolling in the parsley and clovers, and mom went over to inspect. Not seeing anything out of order, she let me off the lead! So like a crazy springtime dog, I was rolling everywhere! It was awsome!

I even have started to avoid the icky stuff and listen when they tell me to come back. So this spring has been awesome because I can run around the meadow free! Nice one for dog. (Its my favorite thing).

The Giant Ball Movie

As promised, here is the Giant Ball Movie (see the last post).

From Lilliput to Wonderland... The Giant Ball

Well, things went from the land of Lilliput to the Wonderland, or as some might say- the land of the giants!! This crazy ball is the ball that mom sits on to do work. I have never really been too interested in it, because it is like every other piece of furniture. But then all of a sudden, dad started bouncing it and I realized it was a giant tennis ball!!!

I love playing ball. I really do. This afternoon, we went to the meadow to fly kites with Jake and Ruth Anne. Dad brought my ball to play with, the red one with the string, and I ran around for a bit with it. But then dad and Jake got out this white ball with seams, and it was hard and they started throwing it to each other and catching it with big hands! It was awesome, I kept running back and forth between them to try to get it. I'll admit I got tired a little bit, but I was re-energized everytime one of them dropped the ball (mostly Jake, dad was awesome!!) and I got it from them and ran away. I was completely uninterested in my ball, seriously.

Anyway, so this giant ball comes along and I had to try to get on top of it. It didn't work very well, but you can check out the video to see how I faired. I almost managed it right at the end, but I think I will try again later. Mom is mad at dad for encouraging me because now she thinks I think I can play with the ball, even though it is her chair... well she is right! I'll get that thing yet!

Ever see that episode of The Office where Jim punches a scissors into Dwight's yoga ball while he is sitting on it? Well, I got four sharp scissors on each hand... hehehe.

Movie to follow...

Land of Lilliput, a doggy fantasy

Ok, so I think it is time to go over one more of my fantasies. We heard about the socks, the caniwulf (and we even got to watch more Vampire shows this weekend, which just reinforced that fantasy). I guess I probably have a lot of fantasies since I am kind of a dreamer dog, I spend most of my time on top of my kennel looking out the window thinking about how I am flying over them all and spot peeing on the people I don't like.

But my new fantasy is a Lilliputian one- and it all started because of the weird visual tricks that happen when dad walks down the stairs. Check it out- it looks like he has shrunk to just his head and I am as big as he is!!! Needless to say, I started freaking out and running around in circles and pawing at his head and licking him through the posts. I thought he really shrank it was really cool! I was a little disappointed when he came back up the stairs.

So now I want a world full of little people. I have noticed other little people at the park and elsewhere, and I always want to play with them or check them out, but their owners won't let them play with dogs, something about getting muddy... I don't know. I think mom and dad should get a little person for me to play with.

Winter Sadness

I know I made all these grand promises in my last blog, and I was fully planning on making good on them, and then I got sick...

Lets just call it the February of Puke... it was spew city at 20 Leckford road. Everything I ate came out, everything that came out I ate (although mom and dad put a stop to that pretty quickly). I was not and am still barely a happy puppy. I was shivering so bad that mom and dad made me a little lair (see above- and if you can't see me, see below). What a nasty ride. Mom got sick too, but its probably not the same thing, she blames me for eating so much poo and she thinks that it got me sick.
Anyway, I was holed up in my blankets for the past few weeks, so my bad about the blog writing. Rest assured that I am fine now, and no one was concerned enough to call the vets. Dad thinks it is just growing pains because he used to eat a lot and sleep a lot when he was growing bigger, he is probably right because I am still full of energy after I puke!

A New Year Puppy

Happy New Year everybody! I know it is now February, but I have been enjoying the semi-nice weather here in Oxford in January. Anyway, I think it is pretty close to the Chinese New Year, so that is New Years enough. I just wanted to let everyone know that we have a full schedule of Winston blogs to come up, with lots of neat pictures and exciting stories from Christmas, Christmas gifts, and the first month of the New Year, so everyone stay tuned!