Class Tonight

Not a lot happened today- mom and dad left all day for class and errands, and I got left by myself yet again. However- tonight is puppy classes!!! I am really excited. As you can see above, that is me checking out the class chairs and making sure everything is safe before class begins.

Below is my teacher talking to the other puppy parents, and me walking across the training floor. There are about 10 other parents with their dogs- Mr. Darcy, Molly, Cocoa, Quincy, and Hettie, (you can see Hettie- the little white puppy and Quincy, the other brown dog in the picture).

Classes are fun. Today we are going to go over Down, Leave it, Walking on a loose lead, Sit, Getting attention, and not biting for an hour before we go home again. I can't wait!

Woof!

Puppy Dog Eyes- Gross?

I don't feel well today, but it made for a very good night!

For the past two days, my left eye has been very red, and oozing yellow pus. I didn't really focus well, although I could see my dad's finger move around with a treat when he was looking at it! I was tired all day, and not really interested in anything (except of course destruction, but that was 5 minutes of an otherwise very lethargic day- and really, come to think of it, I may have been sent into crazies because of my eye irritation).

Dad took me to the vet to get me worming medication, because the 26th is the day for those meds. At the vet, he checked up on my eye, and was told to wash it out with a warm, wet rag and if it still persisted, to make an appointment with the vet.

Just as an aside- I am getting really expensive!! Teeheehee. Vet bills are a lot in British Pounds! The simple trip to the vet turned into a GBP88 excursion!

Last time I got worming medicine, I got something they put into my food, like a powder. I promptly puked that stuff up, all over the place. This time they gave me a tablet in butter! It was delicious, and I seemed fine for a few hours, but while mom and dad were working, I had to go down to the front door, and I puked a pile onto the carpet! It was huge, and gross. I didn't realize I had eaten that much that day!

Needless to say, I wasn't feeling well, so Dad stopped working and let me lie on his chest while he watched TV. I got my eye washed a few times, and then Mom made Dad spend the night on the couch so they could make sure I was ok, and be close. But I wasn't having that! I barked and whined until they finally realized that I was going to sleep on the couch with them! It is one thing to be put into my kennel, and then they go upstairs, but it is quite another to sleep on our couch without me!

Today I feel much better, and my eye is fine- but now I know how to get to sleep on the couch at night! (Just a puke away...)

Woof!

Destructor Doggy Rampage!!

My Teeth Hurt.

Plus I just got some worm and flea medicine that makes me a little crazy.

Plus my eye is acting a little funny.

My walk today was unsatisfying- too short.

What does this mean? DOGGY DESTRUCTOR RAMPAGE!!!!

The following is the aftermath of the raid I performed on the carpets- the red arrows indicate destruction! Pay close attention, for this destruction was only managed by me running around the house like a crazy person then sliding on the carpet as I grabbed the front with my teeth and ripping it a little bit. Then I would tuck my tail between my legs and bound as fast as I could to the next carpet doing the same thing, back and forth, back and forth, never stopping!!!

Of course, I saved the worst for last. I am fond of chewing wood up, as you can see in the next picture, but I managed to get the leg off the table! Muwhahahahaha! I was scolded severely, but I don't see what the big deal is, the table was teetery, and dad fixed it right up with some glue. However because Dad only just managed to catch the table before it spilled everything on me, I had the fear of God put into me so I settled down a bit.

Plus, now more interesting things were happening, and I could ignore all the itchy restlessness!


MuwahahahaWoof!

Blogging Puppy

Its funny how people don't believe that a puppy can write a blog. They say that I am too young, or too short,or that my paws can't reach all the home keys at once, or that I can't read and write or set up an online blogspace. Now I admit that my father does help me with the blog- he set it up for me and taught me how to use it. It is his website after all. But I am in an Oxford education family who puts higher education at the top of priorities for me.

Puppy training is just the beginning! That is just manners and etiquette and lets me play with other puppies. To date I have learned Cyrillic script, Greek Script, and two poems- Jabberwocky, and The Tyger (my favorite), and mom has started reading me Harry Potter! I even learned how to play Go this morning while mom and dad were trying to figure it out over morning coffee!

I don't consider myself a smarter than average puppy, just clever. And I suppose that the reason is because I spend most of my time in a library while my parents are working. (See picture below). After all, when I have chewed all the rawhide, I can better myself through reading! The sun is also nice in the afternoon because it shines right through the window and gives me a nice warm reading space to lie in!


I guess the real question is, why are my parents so bored that they are reading William Blake to me? Well I do request those things. I constantly climb up into my mother's lap to see what she is reading, or get between dad's feet to get at his files- I mean, what is more interesting than me? So I get read to when I do those things, and after a while it became second nature!

People sarcastically ask my dad in conversation about the website if I have a puppy blog up. I guess they think that would be silly because dogs can't blog! They are usually shocked to find out that I actually do. So if you don't believe I can blog, why do people always ask me if I have a blog? And now that you are reading it, oh non-believer, are you enjoying it?!

You know, its a dog's life!

Woof!

Treat Time

What a sleepy day- Friday is a fun day because Dad is done with work for the week, and so I usually get to go upstairs and sleep in the bed with them until late! It is a lot of fun.

After the sleep-in, and some breakfast- it is puppy treats time!

Puppy treats time consists of me getting treats for being cute. All I have to do is sit, lie down, and watch the treat like a hawk going back and forth until I get it! It is lots of fun and I get tons of treats, so many that I get full.

Then it is time to sleep- until it is treats time again.

The only thing is I haven't gone out on too many walks lately, they seem to be slowing down. I try to bolt out the gate and get to Port Meadow or something interesting and pull Mom and Dad along, but they get mad and stop and show me their hand which has chicken in it. So I take some chicken then start pulling again. But mom ends up getting frustrated and has to take me home before we even get down the block! What's the deal? I want to go to Port Meadow again!

Who knows, I do know that mommy loves treats time- she is always saying what a good boy I am and talking in a baby voice. So probably treats time will be soon!

Woof!

Weredog!

Wikipedia defines Werewolf as "A werewolf (also lycanthrope or wolfman) in folklore is a person who shapeshifts into a wolf or wolflike creature, either purposely, by using magic, or after being placed under a curse."

I take great exception to this- I mean, just a person shape shifts? Not withstanding that I think I am a real boy, I do understand that I am of the race dog, not a pink fleshy human. And I am closer to wolf than they are! I mean is it fair that a person can become a werewolf and not a dog?

For instance, I am intrigued by the full moon- I love it. When we go out to potty at night, I can see everything because the air is so clear in Oxford- there are so many stars and the moon looks SO big because it is winter and we are at a higher latitude. It is beautiful. On the one occassion that I was in Port Meadow at night, the full moon was tremendous as we watched the sun set and the moon rise. All the water sparkled, and it felt like I was in a different place.

Often I will sit on my mom's lap as she reads or writes her essays to stare out the window of the office at the full moon. People can walk by, cars can drive past, fireworks can go off- but the moon is the most important. The only thing that can distract me is another dog- and that is mostly just to make sure they are not a wolf, or a weredog. (Or maybe to see if they are a ladydog...)

I haven't howled at the moon yet- I don't really know what that means. All I know is that dad said I should howl when I see the moon. I think he said it jokingly when we were outside one night and I was looking at it rather than doing my business so he could go to bed. However, I have never heard a "howl" and I don't really know what one is. All I know is how to make the tuantaun sound I heard on The Empire Strikes Back. I did that at the moon, but it didn't seem very weredog to me.

There are no references to weredog in any encyclopedia. I suppose this is because wer comes from old Germanic English meaning "man" hence- werewolf is "Man -Wolf". A better term for what I aspire to be would be "Caniwolf" from Canine. This would actually be ideal for me: I want so much to be a wolf, but like I said before, English weather and the lack of kennel (den), food, and radiators would be crappy wolf times. But the night there are full moons there is beautiful weather, and I could be a wolf and run free at night, and then be a dog in the daytime, loved by humans. I would bite other wolf-aspiring dogs, but not eat them because I just want to help them. And rather than ravage virgins (??? What is this, it was in the encyclopedia, so I just repeat it) I would eat toast! It is the perfect solution!

My impression of the Caniwulf... the perfect solution to make a dog-wolf hybrid.

Dog Exile and a Note about Hobbies

I am exiled from the bedroom thanks to my antics the other day. Today Dad bought a door lock that wouldn't allow me to push my way into the bedroom, and therefore I am banished. I received a pretty nasty surprise when I ran at the door, only to be stopped cold. AARGH! Why does everything happen to me? Good Grief.

The rest of the day was pretty much uneventful, though- just walking and chewing, and trying to sneak past into the bedroom, but it isn't happening.

So just a note on Hobbies. I have been looking at my parent's hobbies and they seem interesting enough. Here is a picture of me with one of my mom's hobbies: painting. It is a little crazy that she can get colors onto the thing to make it look like something. Too bad I'm color blind!

Actually I guess I didn't have much to say other than that because I had a picture of me looking at a picture, and I am still a puppy so I don't know how to discuss art.

But I guess we could talk about my hobbies which include chewing, toast, being a wolf, and man-dog wrestling. I still haven't been able to win at man-dog wrestling, but I'm sure I will someday! So for the rest of the day, I am going to practice up, and figure out how to get past that door lock!

Pee for Attention

Yesterday was a bad day. I am sick of not getting any attention from my folks. All they do all day is sit around- whether it is on their computers, doing who knows what, or in front of the TV, or whatever like washing dishes or cooking or cleaning- and then they leave me all by myself in my kennel. They don't give me near enough attention.

Yesterday I fought back. I did the worst thing I could possibly do in rebellion- I peed on their bed. I didn't ask to go out, I didn't let on that I needed to pee, I just hopped up on their bed and peed.

Serves them right.

I guess I have been a bit moody lately, and bitey- getting into stuff that I know they don't want me in, chewing shoes and taking them to my kennel. But you know, I don't get enough attention.

Woof!

Fortress of Tentatude

Woof!

The boiler went out yesterday, which was very distressing for me, because I like the warm weather. Mom and Dad seemed upset that it was so cold, but they got to put on extra jumpers and hats, while I just had to suffer!

As it got colder, I just decided to sleep in my chair up in the office, where it is pretty warm. However, when Mom and Dad got done working, they decided that I needed to go to bed. After some discussion of whether or not I should sleep in my kennel in the cold, they decided that maybe I shouldn't, but rather sleep in their room.

I was really excited to hear this news, especially when dad changed and took me to his room! I immediately jumped into bed, but they had other thoughts in mind for my sleep, and it wasn't in their bed, which frankly, just stunk.

You see, sometimes in the morning when Dad is tired, or I wake him up too early because mom didn't let me outside long enough to do my business before bed. He takes me upstairs to sleep in bed with them for an hour or so before he gets up. I love this! I run all the way upstairs, and immediately jump into bed with mom, and get under the covers as fast as I can. When dad gets in bed, I find a nice, warm spot between both mom and dad and fall asleep instantly under the covers, its like a den away from my kennel- and super warm!

I figured this would be what would happen, because frankly I don't like blankets, because it makes it just look like there are people heads floating in bed with no bodies, because I can't see their legs, and so I was super excited.

Dad had another idea though:

First he just put my chair with the blanket into their room in the corner so I could sleep there. But I kept leaping into bed and digging under the covers so that I could make sure his legs were still attached to his head. Thinking I just wanted to be under the bed, he made me this: My Sheet Fortress!

It was really exciting, and I had a lot of fun in it, but it was so exciting I couldn't get to sleep! I just kept jumping in, jumping out, and playing in the tent, and under. But I didn't want a new den, so I kept trying to get into bed with Dad, where it was warm. Dad kept tossing me off, though, so I just went to play with mom while she continued to study.

I was fine with being in the tent fortress when Dad was just sitting there close to me, but when he got all the way into bed, I just wasn't having it!

Finally Mom tried to get me into bed to sleep there, but to be honest, I just wanted my own kennel back, so I asked to go downstairs, and ended up spending the night downstairs. Mom took my blanket with me, so I could still be under that, and it wasn't so cold with the blanket. However, I did learn my lesson, and woke Dad up by howling at 545 in the morning that way I could go to the bathroom, and then get back into bed with them! I spent the morning between Dad's hip and Mom's butt.

Although, I just have one last note. Mom said I looked like a princess in a princess bed. Wrong! I was a guard dog in his fort...

First Day of School

Yesterday night, was my first day of school... puppy classes, and although I was nervous at first, it was "smashing"!

It all started with a walk! Mom and Dad brought two leashes and so many treats! At first we were just walking where we normally walk, but soon I had no idea where we were. All sorts of crazy thing happened- a big red truck with flashing blue lights and a really loud shrieky sound sped by, terrifying me so much that I jumped into the back of mom's legs- unfortunately dad was holding the leash so all that happened was a big tangle, and they got mad at me! I don't know why they weren't scared. Then we saw a train.

2.2 miles later (seriously, we went to Botley- completely left Oxford by walking!) we showed up at this building that was dark outside. I was happy though because I saw another puppy! Her name was Cocoa, and even if she was a little nervous to see me at first, we made fast friends. Cocoa is one of the first dogs that mom and dad have actually let me play with! Then another dog called Quincy came, then another, then another!

I got to sit next to a Scotty dog named Mr. Darcy whose big head and stubby legs made him look funny... he was bad though because he peed on the floor, it was wierd- so much pee for a little dog! The teacher even used a broom to clean it up, and we all tried to attack the broom but we were on short leashes.

Um... I also sat next to another dog, a dalmation named Molly (yes a girl dog), lets just say I didn't like her very much. (Note from Dad- yes Winston got beat up by a girl...)

We learned all sorts of stuff like how to get a treat from a hand when its over our heads, and look at a treat in dad's hand, and run after a treat on a leash, and crawl under dad's legs to get a treat, and eat chicken!

My neck was a little red from straining to get to the other dogs, though, mom and dad were holding me back for some reason, and the linoleum was slippery so I couldn't get to them very easily.

Also, dad said funny things like "Smashing" and "How Lovely" in a loud voice, which made me laugh because he isn't English like I am.

Then we had to walk home, which really stunk, because we had to go 2.2 miles back. However, after only a mile, dad convinced a taxi thingy to take the puppy by paying the driver an extra 5 quid, which was fun because those things are scary when they go past you, and I was nervous on the inside, even though I have been in one before, but dad held me the entire way, and the driver person was happy I didn't go all over.

Hopefully mom and dad figure out how to get a car for the next puppy classes, but I think I am the head of the class (even though I tried to be the class clown, but Mr. Darcy managed to be that) so I am excited to go back, even if I have to walk.

Next week, I'm sure mom and dad will bring the camera to bring some pictures of me, but first, a picture of something I learned!

Doggy Valentine's Day

I didn't know what Valentine's Day was until today, and let me tell you it stinks!

First, I had to get up early because Dad and Mom left so many dishes in the sink- so Dad did the dishes for about an hour and a half. Where was I? Stuck in my kennel. Usually I get to continue sleeping on the couch while he drinks coffee and reads in the morning... but no, not on Valentine's Day!

Then, he made breakfast- it smelled delicious! Eggs, grilled tomatoes, croissants, strawberries, mango, cheese (mom said it reminded her of a Grandpa Bengfort breakfast), but did I get anything to eat? Well, actually yes, I got some strawberry that fell on the floor. But there was no Toast?! How can you be in the kitchen and not give toast?

Then mom came downstairs, and she was all excited to see the table, not to see me like she normally is! And while they had breakfast, I just sat there trying to jump onto the table, you know, just to investigate and make sure everything was safe, but I kept getting told to get down!
No doggy chocolate, no doggy flowers, no doggy teddy bear. What a crappy Valentine's day.

Oh, Dad just reminded me that I got a ball from Grandmatagi and Grandpa Tim, but that was days ago...

I guess we'll leave Valentine's for the women. (Dad didn't get anything either)

Woof!

Living with Animals

Woof! I just had the very strange epiphany that I live with two very strange animals indeed. I mean, they are nothing like dogs, and yet I just allow them to run around my den all willy nilly! I feel like I have a good understanding about how they should behave in dog terms- but when you think about it, we are just different animals living in the same den!

First- why can't they go in the grass like everyone else?

Second- they eat so high up! They need to share.

Third- they never sleep when I want to, and when I want to play, they just sit in front of a coloured light box. (Yes- coloured, I'm English).

Fourth- They don't bite! They don't like it when I bite!

I see the other dogs with their dog parents, and they are the same as us, but different. That is as profound as I can offer, but I know something is up. I mean, maybe everyone else is just strange.

Have you noticed how similar I am becoming to mom and dad? I heard that dogs and their owners tend to look the same- it is coming true in our case! Which is good for them, because I am the hottest dog in all of England! I know dad is afraid that I am going to get a really big head, but so far so good!

I guess it is good that different animals can live together- it won't be Eden here until I can sit on the furniture and sleep with my kennel door open and use the toast maker, but every day we get a little closer!

Bark!

To Become a Wolf, or at least, To Get Toast

Hello, or should I say woof! My name is Winston Jacob Bengfort, otherwise known as Wraggles, Wrinkles, Winny, Win, bad dog!, Such a Puppy, Sit, Winston MacWraggles, Wrinkle MacWinston, Good Boy, or Come Here. why a dog needs so many names, I don't know- I suspect it has to do with my mom who seems to come up with a new one every day!

Today, after a long walk in the rain, I decided that I should start my own blog. For one, it keeps me out of the rain- and for two I am four months old! I feel like I should be doing something with my life other than just sitting around sleeping, and looking for food. And since I am an English dog with American parents, I figure that I am just as interesting if not more than those other dogs in the park. So here it is- the world from my perspective (or at least the world as viewed from behind my ears).

I suppose I should introduce myself a little bit first- since many of you who are reading this have yet to meet me. My two main ambitions in life are getting toast- the most wonderful substance in all the world! And to become a wolf. I have been trying to get my mom and dad to run with me like a pack, but every time I get about three feet away, I get yanked back by that dang leash.

Which brings me to an interesting subject- the leash. Do wolves have leashes? I think not! And yet, every time I see the leash I get so excited. I don't know why- I mean, I love walks as much as the next guy- a chance to see the worlds, meet other dogs, go to the park to eat cow poo, and jump on pedestrians! But when I see that leash, I go mad because I know that it will keep me from running into the road or jumping into mud or playing with bigger dogs and all those fun things.

I yearn for freedom. Every day that the kennel door opens when my dad wakes me up at 6 AM, I bolt out of it- not because I have to potty, or because I am going to get food, but because I am finally free! It is my den, however, so I do go back in and nap while dad makes coffee. I mean, have you tried to potty outside at 6 am in English weather? I don't think so. When mom closes the door to the office so she can work, I sit at the door waiting, watching, ready to get out. Just so I can sit at the top of the stairs and look down, because I can. (Then I run to tear something else up, or grab socks and hide under the bed!)

The point is, wolves are free- free to run, free to be in their den or not be, free to look out any window they want, and eat any socks they want... oh, speaking of looking out the window, what a nasty day it is outside! Rainy and dreary, and... English... maybe I'll just see if I can go beg for some toast!

Bark!